To cum or not to cum. I don’t know anymore.

Hello all, it is my first time posting here but I felt my post would fit nicely here. It is true story of how I came to agree being kept denied a little longer and me coming to terms with denial. Enjoy <3It had been 7 days of denial, edging, being kept in hypno chastity belt and intense frustration. This was the longest I had gone denied so far and even in this relatively short time I had learned a lot about myself and my body.I was suprised how needy and horny I could get. I understand now how some people might cry from the frustration of not being allowed to cum. It's not just a figure of speech. I have slowly gone from craving an orgasm to begging for permission to edge to touching my pussy being a privilege I often don't get. My Dom said that the next step is to make me beg for any stimulation at all. Sounds unbelievable to me that I would become that desperate of getting any little feeling in my pussy. But then again I probably shouldn't doubt her. I have already been proven wrong by her so many times.But all that aside as today was the day my denial was to finally end."So would you like to cum at the same time, with me? Would that be fun?" My Dom asked."Yes! I would love that so much!" I was so excited. This would be such a nice way to cum. Miss had been teasing me a lot with making me listen to her cum while I squirm. But now I'd get to cum with her, amazing."Hmm I wonder if you are desprate enough to cum. Show me your pussy."As I moved and opened my legs in front of my laptop I let out an annoyed whimper. How could she even suggest I wasn't desprate enough to cum? She had been playing with me every day making sure I was horny and frustrated. Always finding new ways to make moan from pleasure or from being denied it."Spread your lips with our hands. I want to see your clit properly."I did as she told me and laid back. I felt like my cheeks were red from having to show myself like this for Miss to inspect me."Awww it definitely looks swollen. Put one finger inside you, and out."I could feel how unbelievably wet I was. Suprising, considering I had not been allowed to touch much today, but I guess that's what being denied does to you."Yeah the thing is I am not sure what to do with you. I am conflicted if I should let you cum. Do you enjoy being denied?""Yeah" I had to admit I did enjoy it. We had talked about it a lot. How my opinion of denial has changed over time. Actually the most surprising thing in all of this was that I had learned to enjoy being denied. All the little perks. How quickly my pussy was wet when any little erotic thought came to my head. Warm up was so much quicker. How much better touching my pussy felt when I did get the permission. How owned and controlled I felt now that Miss was in charge of my sexuality. And how much fun it was being desperate slut."And touching yourself feels so much better when you are denied?""Yeah, a lot better" I admitted."Do you like being denied long term?" She asked.I hesitated. I had very mixed feelings. I honestly felt really mindfucked, I didn't know anymore what I wanted. Both mind and body were so confused if I wanted to cum or if being kept denied was what I actually wanted. I wanted both, but that obviously wasn't possible. Cumming felt so good, that's what I had been longing for the whole week, wasn't it? But on the other hand I had come this far already. What if cumming was a let down. Then I would have to start from day zero, and all of this frustration this week was for nothing. Which did I want more? I had no idea anymore. Well it was best in any case to answer as honestly as I can. "I mean, I, yeah""And would you like to cum?" She asked."Yes" I realized, how my answers weren't consistent, but honestly at this point I didn't care."It seems you don't know what you want. Let me ask again: do you like being denied long term?""Yeah""Go on then. Say the full sentence.""I like being denied long term." It was true even as conflicted I was, it was still how I truly felt."Again""I like being denied long term.""Good. Then it is decided. You getting to cum with me is cancelled. But instead you will be in chastity belt and listen to me cum."A wave of frustration hit me, or was it pleasure? Was it both? Had I just been played or did I just get what I wanted? What I did know was that I was enjoying this. Being toyed with, kept aroused to a point logical thinking becoming hard and my Miss deciding for me.Thank you for reading, comments are always appreciated. female orgasm denial Get your own Orgasm Control toys: For men: http://www.amzn.to/1V6XQvv For women: http://www.lovense.com/r/0zgdsg